Having your divorce settle prior to trial can be a great thing. Settlements are possible at any point while a case is pending but sometimes one or both parties have an idea about what they think they are entitled to and refuse to budge. Getting a divorce ready to go to trial can be expensive. Attorneys generally try to find options to settle a case as it proceeds toward the trial date. However, when that doesn’t work a good alternative to going to trial can be mediation.
Mediation can be conducted by court order or by agreement of the parties. It is nonbinding (at least until a settlement is reached) and takes place outside of the courthouse, generally at the mediator’s office. A mediator is simply a lawyer skilled in handling divorce cases who attempts to help parties figure out a suitable way to settle their divorce. The process of conducting a mediation is non-confrontational and takes place in the relatively casual atmosphere of an office rather than a courtroom. The parties are usually in separate rooms during the entire process. If you are not able to settle your case everything that you have said to the mediator is confidential unless you specifically authorize the mediator to tell the other side.
The mediator will meet with one party and their lawyer to get their position and then with the other party and their lawyer to get the other party’s position. Mediators talk directly to the parties but your lawyer is right there with you and can explain things to you and answer any questions that come up.
The mediator, lawyers and parties will determine where they think the settlement discussions should begin and start putting together proposals. These are exchanged as long as the parties are working toward an agreement. Sometimes this only takes a few minutes or it can last late into the night. However neither side can be forced to stay at the mediation and either side can leave when they want to. If you reach a settlement, the parties sign an agreement that is filed in your divorce and basically it is over that day.
Some of the potential benefits of mediation are that you don’t have to go to trial, you get your divorce done right then and it might save you money. Also, even if you don’t reach a settlement, it can help you determine what the real issues may be that are the most important to you or the other side. Some of the downsides are that an unsuccessful mediation can be costly. The parties end up paying money to the mediator and their lawyers and still end up without a settlement. You are still faced with paying your lawyer to get your case ready for trial.
Mediation is not for everyone or every case. It is hard to tell which cases it will work for though. I have seen some of the most hotly contested cases that I never thought would settle get resolved in mediation and I have also seen cases that I just knew were going to settle have the mediation fall apart. If you think mediation might be suitable for your case ask your lawyer how to set up a mediation and you may be able to use it to get your case resolved.